Four Years On

A fifty year old guy drove himself to death into a stone wall a few hundred feet from my house at 4:30 on a Saturday morning last month. It was easy to see how his car swerved from the rubber it left before his last moment on earth.
I've thought about him often since. I didn't know him, and as I walk my dog a few times a day in the park across the street where he died and the flowers are laid, the only conclusion I could come up with is that no matter what, life comes and goes far more intensely than we would like to or even can imagine. Only our mothers understand the intensity of our arrivals, so that only leaves death for the rest of us to contemplate.
A famous celebrity died yesterday from a minor skiing accident. Death keeps trying to teach us all a lesson we'd better not accept. Death keeps trying to brainwash us into thinking that it doesn't matter who you are or what you think. Yet God knows it does.
Amazingly, Ken's gone four years now. The intensity of a loved one's passing always leaving us feeling it was only yesterday. Fortunately, that's also true of the happy memories.
I'm listening to Ken's favorite oldies right now. He was thrilled when he found out we could download music for 'free', and so he could "fill in the blanks" of his collection. Some are especially poignant, especially those that remind me of how much Ken loved life and those around him...
Early in the Morning (by Vanity Fare)
Evening is the time of day
I find nothing much to see
Don't know what to do, but I come to
When it's early in the morning
Over by the window day is dawning
When I feel the air
I feel that life is very good to me, you know
In the sun, there is so much yellow
something in the early morning meadow
Tells me that today you're on your way
And you'll be coming home, home to me

Night time isn't clear to me
I find nothing near to me
Don't know what to do but I come to
When it's early in the morning
Very, very early without warning I came
Feel a newly born vibration
Sneaking up on me again
There's a song bird on my pillow
I can see the fun in weeping willow
I can see the sun
You're on your way and you'll be coming
Home, home with me